Recently, I had the opportunity to work during therapy with such a common symptom as cold hands. And here's what I want to share with you in connection with the discoveries of the biology about the symptom of cold limbs.
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Cold hands and feet can have three reasons.
One, you're just cold right now. 😀 you don't need a biology consultant here, you know what to do.
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The second is the active phase of some conflict, where cold limbs are only one of the symptoms, and this is due to the tension of the autonomic nervous system, which controls circulation and in this case brings the person into a state of readiness for escape or attack. It is worth looking for what the situation is right now. What are you preparing to run away from or who to attack? Particular attention should be paid to other symptoms, they will more accurately indicate the content of the conflict. In general, if you catch the conflict in its active phase, realize and resolve it, you can coolly facilitate the recovery phase, where various inflammatory processes take place.
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And the third reason for cold hands and feet is the lack of heat. Only already human. And then cold limbs will be the only symptom. So our psychological conflict becomes biological.
And what's the conflict going to be? What are my examples? "The world around me is hostile. I don't have enough heat from the people around me." "I have no warm friendships with any of my classmates or colleagues. It's lonely for me to spend every day here." "In my family, everyone treats each other coldly and stays separate. I don't have enough warmth from my parents/one of my parents." "My loved one has left/died, I lack the warmth that was between us." "I don't have any real friends, a warm company where I can relax." 'I can't relax in my current life, people around me are hostile, it's important for me to be in good shape all the time.'
These conditions can be reactions to emotionally similar events from childhood. It's not necessarily the first time a conflict has happened now. For example, the child for some reason was separated from the mother, and growing up, a person in situations of separation with loved ones will react to the feelings experienced by cold limbs.
Gilbert Renaud in his works further shares this: hands – lack of heat/separation with the father, and legs – separation or lack of warmth with the mother. But there may be hotly loved grandparents and lost connection with them. Since adolescence, the social circle has been expanding and other people around us are gaining importance.
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My personal observation, based on my own experience and experience with clients: very often not only the event divides us with loved ones or with our social circle. As well as separation from loved ones does not always happen on their initiative. It happens that for some reason we make decisions not to build warm relations with people. There is usually a distrust behind this and a fear of vulnerability. And in these cases, we suffer from our own choices, which we can and should work with in therapy. As well as with the experiences of separation, independent of us.
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Come to look for and resolve conflicts.